Living with heart disease may change your holidays, but you can still have enjoyable and meaningful celebrations. Although heart disease may make some holiday traditions challenging, it doesn't mean you can't enjoy connecting with friends and family during the holiday season. By communicating your limitations due to heart disease, being flexible, and adjusting your expectations, you can help make sure the holidays are happy and memorable.

Communicate Your Needs
Let your loved ones know that connecting with them over the holidays is as important as ever to you, but heart disease is making it hard to plan as usual due to symptoms like fatigue and shortness of breath. Stress can raise blood pressure and increase heart-unhealthy coping behaviors such as overeating, smoking, or drinking too much alcohol. You may also be managing other health conditions such as type 2 diabetes or chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD) as well as heart disease. You need to put your health first or risk worsening your condition.

• Don't be afraid to say no.
• It can help to use direct "I" statements. For instance, "I am not feeling well enough to host this year" is better than "Having everyone over is just too stressful." Communicating in this way makes your needs clear without making others feel accused or burdensome.
• Even if you usually maintain healthy boundaries, the holidays are a time when they may be tested. If a friend or family member tries to make you feel guilty for setting your boundaries, gently remind them that heart disease doesn't take the holidays off, as much as you wish it did.

Be Flexible
Instead of saying "no," say "yes" to something else. If a family tradition no longer works for you since you developed heart disease, it may be time to suggest an update.

• If you can't travel as usual, consider offering to host. Ask others to bring potluck dishes and help clean up so you don't wind up overdoing it.
• If you usually host the gathering but can't do it this year, encourage someone else to host instead. They may be delighted to welcome everyone to their home for a change.
• If you always bring a beloved dish, but it doesn't fit your new diet, consider trying a healthy remake. The American Heart Association offers free recipes, including updates of many holiday favorites. Chances are other guests will be grateful for a healthier option.
• If you can't bring yourself to give up the party, think of ways to save time and energy. Use paper plates, plastic flatware, and disposable tablecloths for easy cleanup. Make decorating (or de-decorating) part of the event and get everyone to help. Plan a low-impact meal such as a stew that simmers all day in the crock pot with little prep work or tending.

If it's just not possible to get together in one place this year, consider using a video chat service such as Skype, Zoom, or FaceTime to have a special holiday call on a smartphone or laptop. During a video chat, you can:

• Watch family open gifts
• Have them show you the decorations around the house
• Read a holiday story or poem to the children
• Sing favorite holiday songs together

Adjust Your Expectations
Even without a chronic illness like heart disease, holidays often come with high expectations that lead to disappointment and stress. Letting go of the illusion of a "perfect" holiday can help you keep expectations realistic and focus on what's most important about the holidays. For many people, that means connecting with loved ones, being thankful for what you have, and finding hope for the new year.

Here are some mindful tips from Johns Hopkins Medicine for adjusting holiday expectations:

• Accept that your holidays won't be perfect and will be different from celebrations in years past.
• Focus on what really counts. Find things to be grateful for and look for new ways to connect with loved ones.
• If you get into a conflict with someone over the holidays, take a few breaths before you react. Try to stay compassionate and react with kindness.
• As you reflect on last year, be kind to yourself and let go of any negativity. As you look forward to next year, make smaller, gradual resolutions rather than huge goals that will be difficult to achieve.

During the holidays and year-round, the members of MyHeartDiseaseTeam are here for each other. Joining MyHeartDiseaseTeam means gaining a support group of thousands of others with heart disease who understand exactly what you're going through.

Here are some conversations from MyHeartDiseaseTeam members about navigating the holiday season with heart disease:

• "This is Canadian Thanksgiving weekend. Going to a friend's, but I get to escape cooking this year."
• "Still lots to do before winter. I managed on doing lots and that's probably why I don't feel well. I can use a break."
• "I have realized that I cannot carry on the way I have been - I have to slow down activities and take better care of myself. Letting my family cook Thanksgiving dinner, letting my husband carry and lift things for me."

Have you found ways to celebrate the holidays despite heart disease?
Share in the comments below or post on MyHeartDiseaseTeam.