I find myself suddenly wanting to rush home and get back to "safety" when I am at a doctor's waiting room, a public elevator...And then I realize that although everyone in my family are wonderful helping me, I try not to need help so I don't feel like I am imposing.
Recently I pulled into a parking lot for one last errand, felt panicked, drove right out and went home. I realized that I just can’t do the things I used to do and i’m learning to pay attention to my body.
All I could do to walk, had to hold onto things to get yo the bathroom, blood pressure was 200/120, wife wasn't home, so I went by ambulance to the ER, set off alarms everytime the automatic blood pressure machine took my blood pressure, yet they sent me home, 3 hours later, told me to see my family doctor. This was at s hospital who advertises that they are a great heart hospital. Did not even keep me for observation. After seeing my family doctor. He sent me to a heart doctor.
Put on medication, had a cardiac MRI, found out I have a 4.01 cm aneurysm, plus 3 leaky heart valves, which heart doctor says not to worry about.
I am not one to complain, but I run out of energy very quickly, I give 110% at my job. To look at me, people think there is nothing wrong with me and tend to think I am just lazy. I do not wish this on anyone, but I think everyone should have to live with heart problems, for one week, they would see that it is hard.
Yes, I agree. I find I can't wait to get home. I have always been a very optimistic person, but now I find that I don't even want to go to my favorite store. I also have multiple issues with my stomach, but I know a lot has to do with anxiety. I do find that I am better if I take small excursions and don't put too much on my list of "to do's". We have to remember each day is a blessing and be positive and thankful!
It feels so freeing to speak if our worries and fears, I feel like I'm breathing easier just talking with you all. Thank you so much!
I think the only time I really feel vulnerable is when I get over tired, sometimes when i’m Feeling pretty good I find myself pushing myself to get a few more things done. Then fatigue sets in and I get nervous. I have been working on this for some time, I do not have it solved as yet.